Losing Control To Let Grace Win

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It was nearly a year ago and it was the end of summer in Louisiana. The humidity and heat hung onto me like the spanish moss surrounding Manressa Retreat Center. During the silent retreat, I found myself listening intently in the “great silence” to the teachings of our retreat leader and movements of God’s Spirit.

As I have combed through the notes of that retreat, a number of nuggets were revealed. None more appropriate lately to me than these words…

“Rather than try to control, we should live in a state of grace.” -Fr. Mike French, SJ

From the perspective of armchair theology, the idea of a Roman Catholic priest speaking of grace may seem out of place. But a deeper study finds it is not so out of place. Ignatian Spirituality and practice was methodical and offered means of grace long before John Wesley and the Oxford Holy Club received the moniker of “Methodists.”

And John Wesley would later state, “However much any man has attained, or in however high a degree he is perfect, he still needs to ‘grow in grace,’ and daily to advance in the knowledge and love of God his Savior.” And while we are all very adapt at advancing in knowledge of God, where is the passion and zeal for advancing in our love of God? We have created whole institutions in schools, colleges, seminaries, and our churches in the former...but just where are the places for the latter now?

It seems to me, we can control knowledge. We can shape it and categorize and teach it and test on it but grace is something out of our control. Jesus teaching on the matter seems best found to me in the parable of the workers of the vineyard…

1“For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire laborers for his vineyard.2“When he had agreed with the laborers for a denarius for the day, he sent them into his vineyard.3“And he went out about the third hour and saw others standing idle in the market place;4and to those he said, ‘You also go into the vineyard, and whatever is right I will give you.’ And so they went.5“Again he went out about the sixth and the ninth hour, and did the same thing.6“And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing around; and he *said to them, ‘Why have you been standing here idle all day long?’7“They *said to him, ‘Because no one hired us.’ He *said to them, ‘You go into the vineyard too.’ 8“When evening came, the owner of the vineyard *said to his foreman, ‘Call the laborers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last group to the first.’9“When those hired about the eleventh hour came, each one received a denarius.10“When those hired first came, they thought that they would receive more; but each of them also received a denarius.11“When they received it, they grumbled at the landowner,12saying, ‘These last men have worked only one hour, and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden and the scorching heat of the day.’13“But he answered and said to one of them, ‘Friend, I am doing you no wrong; did you not agree with me for a denarius?14‘Take what is yours and go, but I wish to give to this last man the same as to you.15‘Is it not lawful for me to do what I wish with what is my own? Or is your eye envious because I am generous?’16“So the last shall be first, and the first last.” (Matthew 20:1-16,NASB)

What kind of nonsense is this? This is completely foreign to our ears just as surely as it was to the workers in the story and those disciples who heard it. In our day, the unions would be called in as well as the labor department! But the point is, this is grace, this is how God operates.

And, we are to grow in it and live in it for we are called to people of grace just as Jesus has shown us. While we may control knowledge of God (though this is questionable), we are not going to be able to control grace. As much as we try, it will “slip through our fingers,” as Princess Leia said to Grand Moff Tarkin in Star Wars, A New Hope. And personally, I’m not fond of the idea of being on the side of any Empire building plans.

The gospel of Jesus Christ is intended to release us from sin, and certainly, the sin of pridefulness. We are released to love God and love our neighbors, to live fully in grace BOTH as recipients and partakers but also as givers of grace - caregivers of the souls of others help fast by our sinful natures.

Living in a state of grace, I think, means we must stop and look intently at what we are receiving from God (not just what we have received but what we constantly are being given). And while we are in the midst of such blessing, consider, not why others aren’t receiving the same but why is the grace not overflowing from us? If sinners don’t experience the grace, are we actually living in the grace?

We aren’t called to determine the worthiness of others to receive God’s grace but the vessels that carry God’s grace to a thirst and dying people...just like we once were.  It isn't a cheap grace, it is costly because it costs us our control...something we really never had anyway.